Are there any flowers you like? Roses? Tulips? Cherry blossom? Orchids? Do you like them because they are colorful? Or is it because they smell good?
These are undeniable very beautiful flowers, but my favorite one is dandelion.
When people see a dandelion, they may think it's just another wildflower which isn't good-looking, is fragile and weak. But no, dandelions aren't weak even though they may look like they're falling apart.
Everything You Don't Know About Dandelions
Do you know where the name "dandelion" comes from? It's from French "dent de lion", which means the lion's tooth. The flower is being called the lion's tooth because of its coarsely-toothed leaves.
The dandelion is the only flower that represents the sun, moon and stars. The yellow flower resembles the sun, the puff ball resembles the moon and the dispersing seeds are the stars.
Every part of the dandelion is useful. Its root, leaves and flower can be used for food and medicine.
Dandelions have one of the longest flowering season, and their parachute seeds can be carried by wind as many as 5 miles from their origin.
They are also sun-loving flowers. They grow freely wherever they find a bit of earth and a place in the sun.
How I Fell in Love with the Wildflower
Where I live, it's not easy to see dandelions. But I still sometimes see them out in the countryside. I still remember the first time I saw dandelions. My first impression on them was, wow this cotton-like thing is cute! And as a child, I just wanted to blow all the seeds away. As I grow up, I started to understand the nature of dandelions, and I just can't help falling in love with this free-spirited flower.
I used to be quite an inflexible person. It's difficult for me to let go of things because I can't really handle the feeling of things getting out of control. I loved to have everything planned and well-arranged. And I would be very upset if anything unplanned happened.
I didn't understand that life never really came with a perfect plan.
Some years ago, I had a relationship with a guy whom I loved. We treated each other's family as our own family. We planned about our future. I also put a lot of effort in the relationship, hoping our lives would go the way we planned. But no, things didn't go as planned, we broke up. I was really depressed. I could cry anywhere at any time. I also lost almost 10 pounds in a month.
A year ago, I got really stressful at work, so stressful that I couldn't sleep well and I couldn't eat well. I love my career as an editor. I had always done my very best to get good topics and articles reached my readers. It had always been smooth and readers loved the content. But I got lost when I got stuck facing a challenge — a change in the media market shattered the way I thought and the way I worked on content. I started to doubt my ability of being a good writer and editor, I started to doubt if I was passionate enough for my career, I started to wonder if the career was my true calling or if I was only too proud to quit.
My mind was a mess during my very lost period. I talked with friends about my struggles, and thought about my life quietly whenever I was alone. I also read plenty of books about stress, change, growth, and life. It took me some time to finally realize what was messing with my mind — my will to have everything in control, my fear of uncertainties.
I wondered why dandelions could be so fearless.
Dandelions are so light in weight that they can fly to anywhere far away from their origin and start their lives all over again. It almost seems no effort to them to let go, nothing can really weigh them down. They also seem to be fearless even though they aren't sure where they're going to land with the flying seeds.
If dandelions were afraid of uncertainties, they would just cling to their stem and would never grow and become something better. If dandelion seeds had fear that weigh them down, they would never go too far away. If dandelions were afraid to change, they'd just stay in the same place and never be free.
I learned to live like a dandelion.
My urge to hold things on tight hurt myself. My unwillingness to let go of what can't be controlled stopped me from growing. I fell, I learned, and I picked myself back up. I started to live like a dandelion.
"Hold tenderly that which you cherish, for it is precious and a tight grip may crush it. Do not let the fear of dropping it cause you to hold it too tightly. The chances are, it's holding you too." — Bob Alberti
I've learned to always expect the unexpected to happen. I've learned to do my very best and just let the rest be. I've learned that I don't need everything to be constant, consistent, and under my control. (Because that's no fun!) I've also learned that when I let go a little bit, I'm happier and I actually grow into someone better.
Ever felt like you don't fit in anywhere? It's alright, that's not your fault. (Yea, Divergent is real.)
Some people can easily find the group they belong to, some just can't, not because they aren't capable but because they're just different. And being different doesn't mean it's wrong.
In our society where there's a norm that we're used to and would like everyone to follow, people rarely doubt what they're taught to believe or dare to be different.
When the world keeps changing, things keep changing, our minds can't really catch up with the change. We tend to stick to the status quo because it's safe, it's stable, and it's almost effortless. And being different could mean walking alone, which is a lot more risky than staying in the big group. In order to survive, we're inclined to the safe approach, it's just human nature.
So people try their best to make sure everyone fit it, especially people who're close to them. At first it may just because they want them to be safe too, at least by how they define "safe". But they've never really thought about what'd really be best for different people. Things that fit their needs don't always fit others'. What they see as dangerous might actually be safe to the other ones.
For those who are trying hard to fit in any groups, start to explore who you really are instead. The harder you try to fit in others, the more you're concealing your real self. Stop looking for approval from others, stop living to meet others' expectation, and start to look into yourself and ask, who you really are, what you really want, and whether you'd really be happy even after you've "fitted in".
If you can't imagine yourself being happy even after trying so hard for a long time to fit in, you'd better stop. After all, it's your own life and you're the only one who's responsible for yourself. All the things you experience and feel, no one else can understands as much as you do. If you're not doing things that you love and want, you're the only one who suffers.
I'm not saying you should shut yourself out from your closest ones' advice. They give you advice because they love you. Listen to what they say, but think with your own brain. Being true to yourself isn't the same as going reckless. Clearly think about what you truly want for yourself, not for anyone else. It takes courage to be a little rebellious towards the "norm", but it's all worth it at the end when your life is fully lived.
More great stuff to read:
How It's Like to Be A Person Who Feels So Deeply
How To Give Up On Your Dream
My sis is graduating today, going to her graduation ceremony be like, wow people here are so young, so fresh. I wonder what these graduates think about their future.
It's totally just the beginning of another stage of life. And these graduates will realize every challenge they encountered when they were still students really was just nothing. All the big things they thought which were like disasters to them were just small things when they look back to those times a few years later. They'll find out, the real education only starts when they finish school. All those silly times at school were great, but they'll have to face the reality and the real world out there, finally.
What's that thing that they have to face? Umm, growing up, yes, that's the thing.
You never wanted to deal with growing up (I know, I've been there too), but you'll find out that you don't really have a choice. This is no longer about your parents wanting you to, nor your boss of your first job asking you to, but because that's the only way you can make yourself better and stronger. You don't grow up to please others, no. You grow up for your own good sake.
Growing up may seem scary at first, but as time goes by, you'll get better. Well, things will not get easier in your life, it's just you will grow stronger. You'll experience failures, you'll make lots of mistakes, and things will not go the way you plan. You may find yourself feeling lost at some point of your life, not sure whether you're taking the right path for yourself, and trying to find out what you truly want and who you truly are. Feeling lost is okay, before you find your way you have to feel lost first. You'll be disappointed, by others and by yourself, but it's alright too because you'll know yourself more.
Don't let growing up scare you fellows! As part of the life process, enjoy every moment of growing up -- the joy, the tears, the pain and the rage. Your life is made up of all those moments. Embrace the changes that you'll face and make growing up meaningful and remarkable. When you take off the gowns, you'll have to get ready for the journey to explore yourself and the reality.
Some people may think that the pain of a heartbreak is less severe if a relationship lasts only for a very short time; some believe that if you're not very much into the relationship, the pain of a heartbreak will be bearable. But is it?
Every time you get into a relationship, you risk showing the most vulnerable part of yourself to another person. You actually choose to take out your heart and try to connect it with another person's heart. Imagine two connected hearts being torn apart, of course it will hurt. Even though you may not be super into the relationship, you did connect a part of your heart with the other person's. When the bonding is broken, tearing the connected part of the hearts is of course still a painful experience, same painful.
Time isn't a factor that causes a heartbreak more or less hurtful either. It does take time for a relationship to grow, and it's likely that the two hearts get more connected as time passes. But there're also relationships in which the passion and feelings fade as time goes by, and on the other hand some people get really really connected within a very short time.
The level of how much you're into the relationship, however, may affect how fast you recover from the pain. The more connected the hearts, the bigger the wound will be left when they're torn apart; and so it'll probably take a longer time for the wound to heal.
So I'd say, all heartbreaks hurt the same. If you get into a relationship, expect that you may experience another heartbreak which can be as painful as your last one. (I'm not saying that you should not have faith in your relationships, it's just preparing for the worse while hoping for the best!)
Despite what I've said, it doesn't mean that you should not let yourself be into a relationship much in order to avoid the long heart-healing process. Every heartbreak is a lesson in life. You'll learn something that will stay with you for the rest of your life. A heartbreak also means that you have experienced love. And life is so short that it's better to have experienced it than regret never having been in love.
More great stuff to read:
How It's Like To Be A Person Who Feels So Deeply
Why You Still Choose To Fall Into An Uncommitted Relationship
When you feel that you’re in love with a person with commitment issues, you can’t help thinking why you fell in love with him in the first place. Why would you, such a lovely girl, think that you deserve being with a guy who didn’t even plan to spend the future with you?
You knew that you had to take this relationship easy, and you shouldn’t have any expectations. You knew that the more you expected, the more painful you’d feel when you got disappointed. You manage your emotions carefully, and you constantly remind yourself not to be too into the relationship -- but is that possible?
As time goes by, you inevitably spend more time and put more emotions into the relationship. You find this whole thing quite toxic, especially after you’ve read so many articles about what a toxic relationship is like. You wonder if you should let go of this earlier, yet in your heart you want to go on with this because you still like him. You convince yourself that “there’s nothing to lose” because you’ve already passed through some really painful breakups and holding on to this relationship is just going to be another life experience, another harsh lesson. You think, “What could be worse? Probably it’s just going to be another heartbreak, another massive cry; I can get through it surely.” It looks like you can convince yourself that way, but your instinct and your heart keep telling you that this relationship could be slowly intoxicating you.
You feel like you’re in an addiction. You know the relationship is not healthy, but you still take it all. You know you can get rid of this addiction yet you don’t want to stop it at all. You want to wait until that fire really goes off and then you can gladly say goodbye. (And for sure you know this ain’t logical at all!)
But wait a minute and think again, this is sort of what you actually expected. You expected that you just wanted to have a try and see what thrill would be added to your many years of life experience. You didn’t want to regret letting your fear stop you from experiencing life.
“If only we could see the endless string of consequences that result from our smallest actions. But we can't know better until knowing better is useless.”
You make your choices, but you can never know everything or have control of everything. Why not just stop struggling, experience life and enjoy the ride? You may feel really sad at the end, but you will be fine!
More great stuff to read:
How It's Like To Be A Person Who Feels So Deeply
Things Change, People Leave, And Life Doesn't Stop for Anyone
People change, like seasons, and there's nothing you can do about that.
You can only learn to accept it because you do need to understand that you're just human being, and you have limitations. You can't control everything and everyone; yet you can control your own mind.
I know it hurts when you have to accept changes. It's not the change that hurts you, it's the memories of how things used to be that hurt. A mature person would understand that what happened, happened. The past cannot be changed, memories' gonna stay. It's the present and future that you need to work on, so focus on figuring out the best ways to move on.
Let go and move on - it's easier said than done, I know. But you have to remember that you're not doing this alone. You still have family and friends who love and care about you. There're people standing by you. There're people who believe that you'll be able to go through the tough times and get out of the storms stronger.
Things change, people change; but life doesn't stop for anybody. Life goes on, and you must move on. There's no "what if" or "could have"; there's only "it is".
More great stuff to read:
Why You Should Follow Your Dreams Now, Not Later
How Keeping A Diary Makes My Life Better
"All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them." - Walt Disney
We all had a dream when we were small, didn't we? But how many of us have really followed our dreams and made them come true?
There're a couple of common reasons why people don't follow their dreams. Some blame it on reality, saying that their dreams are not down-to-earth and won't help them to make a living; some blame it on their capability, saying that they don't have enough time, energy or money to equip themselves with the skills needed. I have to be realistic too, that for some people, money could be a great restriction. Yet, not all of the people who choose not to follow their dreams have that limitation. What limits them is their fearful mind.
People are fear of the unknown and the uncertainty; they're fear of stepping out of their comfort zone and doing what others aren't doing. They want to make sure everything's right and ready. They want to be absolutely certain about everything first.
Recently I've visited an art exhibition held by a local institution. There were a lot of inspiring works painted by young artists. I was especially impressed by this one:
Inside all of those cans are the dreams this girl has over the time. One by one, the dreams just "expires" like canned goods as time passes. The girl's dreams have never come true, and she just looks at them expire. All her dreams have been lost and there's nothing she can do to chase back those times.
Are you storing your dreams somewhere but not doing anything about them? If your answer is yes, please dig them out before it's too late. You don't need to wait for the best condition to do what's right for you. If you keep waiting for the perfect time to do the thing you want to do, you may end up missing all the valuable chances.
Don’t wait. The time will never be just right. - Napoleon Hill
If you're someone who feels deeply for your surroundings, you live on the edge of depression and joy. At one moment you feel so happy about the bird tweeting on the branch nearby; at another moment, the falling of leaves reminds you of the emotionless law of nature. Your emotions go up and down so often that you're sometimes frustrated about this too.
I'm the kind of person who feels very connected to things and people around, so I do understand how it feels to be a person who feels so deeply:
There's nothing wrong with feeling so deeply about everything. This is who you are, and because of you, the world is a little less cold.
More great stuff to read:
How Keeping A Diary Makes My Life Better
An Open Letter to Whom I Don't Want to Let Go Of
Trusting was supposed to be easy. You believe what another person says by believing that the others mean no harm to you and just speak their minds honestly.
I'm not sure since when, I don't trust people so easily. Maybe as we grow up, we see too many things that are unjudged, unfair...we hear too many lies and promises that are broken...we let too many people disappoint us...
Today, watching the everyday news in Hong Kong, and reading all the information about occupying central flooding around the internet, I can't identify what information is true any more. Are those facts or stories made up by people? Things shown in the media can be edited in every way to please a group of people. Things the government or people tell you can just be lies. Political parties or other countries' government show that they care about your democracy movement can be just political shows.
You just won't know the entire truth by staying at home staying tuned with the news and information.
One morning, when I got on the bus to work, I realized that my octopus card got out of money and I only had a paper money of $500 in my wallet. I didn't know what to do and was trying to look for someone on the bus for help. At that moment, the driver said to me "It's okay, pay me back tomorrow." I was like, really? Then I thanked him. The following few days, I'd been waking up late and missed that bus. Finally, after almost a week, I could catch that bus. The driver recognized me too and I paid for the two trips.
The driver didn't know me, and I actually don't take that same bus every day, but he chose to trust me that I would pay him back another time.
I always thought that trust had to be earned and accumulated throughout some time. It's not easy for people to trust each other these days. Greed, selfishness, lies are all around us. A driver who doesn't really earn that much can trust a customer whom he doesn't know, the faith he has in life and in people suddenly became something that I thought I had to learn.
It is because I love Hong Kong so much, I feel that trust should be something that needs to be kept in this city. The trust between people and the government; the trust between people with different political stance; and people's trust for the media etc.
I'm not a warrior, neither am I any kind of political or democracy movements' leader; yet I have conscience and a voice to speak up. I can stand by this Umbrella Revolution and fight for a trustworthy government and a media that will not be censored. I can write about what I see and what I feel and try what I can do to keep the "trust" in this city.
This is what I saw in Hong Kong's "Umbrella Revolution" - peaceful and rational people showing their concern and demand for democracy in the streets. Some of these people are just students, and some are elderly. They put their tents in the streets and stay there silently to show the government their persistence in carrying on this Revolution. Their lives and their stuff are just there, relying on each other to protect their safety. Can you imagine all these strangers trusting each other so much that they share all the foods and resources together in this area (Admiralty)? Though they didn't know each other, they came together and stayed in this place. Everyone has the same goal - true democracy, universal suffrage, and a government that serves the people with honesty.
Hong Kong people are fighting for more than just democracy. Everyone is fighting for justice and a trustworthy government. Some people don't buy the "Umbrella Revolution", thinking it's a waste of time to try to change something decided by the Chinese Government. But I'm telling you no, this movement is worthwhile. The Revolution has increased the people's awareness on the progress of liberty and freedom, not only people in Hong Kong but also people around the world.
Trust will still exist in this place, but only if we have faith in it and take action for it.
It's been some time, but I still miss you so much. I dream of you almost every night. Every time I think of you I cry. Every morning I have that hollowness in my heart which is killing me. Things around me just always remind me of you. It's such a hard thing for me to accept that you've already been trying to let me go but I just can't do the same to you. I seem ok when I hang out with friends (which I've been doing a lot recently) but actually I'm not. I don't seem to be able to put you behind my mind. What we did and talked about just a week before you said you needed time to think about our relationship were real. Why things could change completely just a week later? Why you can be so hard-hearted to me...
We had two brilliant years together. I loved you and I still do. Maybe I don't know much about love either, maybe that's just feelings for you...but I never thought about giving up this relationship, and I never thought about giving up on you. I always had faith in you...
Remember you said you wanted to be my first and last boyfriend? Where's that passion in you now? I'm still hoping this to come true. Every memory I recall about you is happy and sweet one. I wonder how you feel when you recall those memories.
I had never cried while playing the piano. Now I really can infuse my emotions to the melodies. Not sure if it's something I really want to be able to do though. All of a sudden, I find myself related to all the sad songs and I finally understand the lyrics...even the melodies.
My brain tells me to be logical, to let go of you, and to accept that this is happening, that we're no longer together. But my heart keeps telling me that there maybe still a chance that we'll get back together. I just need to do something to touch your heart, something to get that spackle back into our relationship.
It's been weeks that we haven't contacted each other, not a call, not even a text message. How have you been? I know it's not like a very very long time....but having you disappeared in my life for a few weeks is a really long time. Do you know how I'm actually feeling? Do you understand how much I miss you?
I'm trying my best to move on. I totally understand that life must go on. I'll sleep, eat and live well, yet that doesn't mean I'm okay not to have you in my life. I wish to have you back in my life.
More great stuff to read:
Nothing - A poem about a breakup story
Some People Are Worth Melting For - What Olaf from Frozen Teaches us About Love